If the autumn leaves hitting your windshield and 50-degree temperatures have rendered you into a catatonic state, no worries there is no longer any need to remove yourself from the couch. Fall TV season is really back in full force and this is going to be an epic week for TV lovers. There's a lot of ground to cover so let's not waste any more time.
BEST BET: RETURNING SERIES
“It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia” returns for its sixth season tonight on FX. If you don’t already watch, start now.
Have you been inexplicably craving a milk steak, boiled over hard, with a side of jelly beans?
Do you feel the need to throw salt on anyone who might be irritating you?
Does sipping wine from a Diet Pepsi can seem like a brilliant solution to your (functioning?) alcoholism?
If you are suffering from these symptoms, this is a clear indication that it's time for new season of "It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia." For the poor saps who don't already know this, it's only the most entertaining show on television right now. Dennis, Mac, Charlie, Frank and Sweet Dee are back for a sixth season of crazy schemes and sociopathic tendencies tonight at 10 p.m. on FX with "Mac Fights Gay Marriage."
Let me be of some service to those who are unfamiliar with "Always Sunny" but are considering jumping in for season six. The show is comprised of the warped, sadistic and completely irreverent antics of five pals (henceforth referred to as "The Gang") running a bar together called Paddy's Pub. If I were to write a prescription for "Always Sunny" fever, it would include the following episodes, which I consider to be some of the series' best, with one pick from each season (trust me, I'm a professional):
1. "Underage Drinking: A National Concern" (season one) The Gang realizes that the moneymaking potential of Paddy's can be maximized by capitalizing on the high schoolers already frequenting the bar. They also realize that this is their chance to hit up keggers, the prom and indulge in some high school drama.
2. "Dennis and Dee Go on Welfare" (season two) Dennis and Dee decide to ditch their day jobs to fulfill their dreams but still need some cash, so they get a little hooked on crack in order to get some cash courtesy of welfare.
3. "Sweet Dee's Dating a Retarded Person" (season three) The guys convince Dee her new boyfriend might be mentally challenged; meanwhile, an attempt to form a band goes awry and some glue-huffing results in "Day Man," a song that should have won an Emmy.
4. "Dennis Reynolds: An Erotic Life" (season four) Dee and Charlie try to walk in each other's shoes, which involves a chemical reaction resulting from the consumption of cat food, beer and glue, and dry heaving while attempting to perform stand-up comedy.
5. "The Gang Gives Frank an Intervention" (season five) Frank (Danny Devito) has been getting more and more out of control, and The Gang finally decides to set him straight. This intervention includes guns, intimidation and drinking while intervening. Most importantly, however, this episode involves Gail the Snail.
"Boardwalk Empire" premieres Sunday, Sept. 19 at 9 p.m. (taking the "True Blood" time slot after last Sunday's underwhelming season finale). This is most definitely my pick for best new show of the fall season and here's why:
1. The premise, which involves sweet, delicious corruption in Prohibition-era Atlantic City, with plenty of crooked politicians and gangsters.
2. Steve Buscemi is the star and it's about time the man has an opportunity to truly shine in a leading role that capitalizes on his weirdness and tremendous skills as an actor.
3. Martin Scorsese is one of the executive producers and directed the first episode.
WHAT ELSE IS NEW
There are so many season and series premieres on this week, I can't list 'em all, but here's a handful of projected highs and lows.
GET OUT OF TOWN
The lo-fi surf punk of Wavves will be at the Mohawk Place in Buffalo tonight. The band is the primary effort of San Diego's Nathan Williams. He plays guitar and has filled out the lineup with a variety of musicians including Zack Hill of Hella. The newest Wavves album, "King Of The Beach," was released in August on Fat Possum Records. Tickets are $12 and the show starts at 8 p.m. The Mohawk Place is located at 47 E. Mohawk St.
April Diodato is the OBSERVER Lifestyles editor. Give her the dish on what's happening at firstname.lastname@example.org