America makes an appointment with the Doctor, et. al.

America speaks:

Doc, I feel lousy. Not sure how much is real or how much is in my head, but I’ve got to do something.

Physically, I feel hot most of the time – like my body temperature is two degrees above normal, and it lasts for weeks. It feels like the sun is just burning through my skin, and when I’m outside it seems like there is no real shade – the heat just radiates through everything. I have to crank the AC even at night, and maybe that’s what’s causing my headaches. And there are these little marks on my skin – they don’t seem like normal aging spots.

Another thing – I feel extremely thirsty much of the time, like I have chronic dry mouth. Sometimes at night I have this dream where I’m walking miles and miles across a barren land toward a river valley. But when I get there, there is no river, just a long ribbon of fire.

Other times I feel a cold sweat, like water is just pouring out of my skin and I’m trembling against a powerful wind, like it’s trying to cleanse my body of toxins. And sometimes there is this feeling in my gut, this rumbling sensation like some foreign object has penetrated too deep and is about to explode.

I’m nervous, and eating seems to calm me down. I know I’m overweight, but I’ve tried all kinds of pills and shots and nothing seems to work for long. I’ve tried exercising, but it hurts – my muscles are weak, and my ankles and feet are badly swollen.

What’s worse, Doc, is my mental state. I admit to spending a lot of time on the computer, but it helps me escape from my crappy reality, and it always promises new information. But sometimes I feel terribly split there, like there are two people inside the chambers of my consciousness who hate each other, who fight over everything. It’s as if they are being egged on by someone or something that warps truth and gains strength through violence. Worse, I feel like I’m losing my voice, my ability to speak out, like I am not free to be me.

I used to love the fine arts – the classics in theater, music, literature, art, and films. Lately I’ve lost all interest. Sometimes I feel embarrassed because people from other countries see me as a ridiculous bully and make a mockery of me. That makes me angry, so I want to lash out and blame someone. And to relieve the stress, I spend more and more money buying stuff on Amazon.

At the end of the day, however, I’m lonely. I have a thousand friends and chat mates on social media, but I’ve never felt so alone.

Worst of all, I worry about the children, about their future. I have gone so far in debt that it will take generations to repay – their generation and beyond.

The Good Doctor speaks:

You want the good news or bad news first?

The good news is, you ain’t dead yet! And your physical problems may be treatable. We will run all the tests and then determine how to proceed, but I can tell you this for certain: you need to change your behaviors. So, in the meantime, I am referring you to my friend, the Good Mental Health Specialist.

The Good Mental Health Specialist speaks:

America, let’s start our therapy by acknowledging that the mental problems you face are largely a product of your own doing, and it is not helpful to cast blame on outside entities. So I’ll tell it like it is: you are an addict. You are addicted to social media, and a bunch of other unhealthy things. There is a process, a series of steps to recovery if you are willing to commit. Meanwhile, I’m referring you to my friend, the Good Priest.

The Good Priest speaks:

America – to hell with the “Our Fathers” and “Hail Marys.” You need to act fast because time is running out. I trust that my professional friends will take care of their end of the bargain. But you need more than their intervention; you need other people! Real, warm blooded people who care!

We are social beings, America. Like a Horse, our liberty lives in the heart of the herd running free across the plains. Or, like the flight of birds in such an alignment as to bear the brunt of the hostile winds and to guide us to our destiny, we are each other’s moral compass. While some are able to walk alone through life, most cannot.

So, first, turn off the damn device! Get off your ass and go for a walk. Hang out with other people. Go to a party. Join a real life charitable or artistic social group. Or (and I highly recommend this) go to church! Do the long walk toward salvation with others. But wherever you walk, walk toward humanity. And have a little faith, for without it, you have nothing at all.

Writer/musician Pete Howard lives in Dunkirk. Send comments to odyssmusic20@gmail.com