Editor’s note: This is the first of two parts.

In the last article, I spoke of the characteristics that young people between the ages of 12 to 17 exhibit as they cross over into chemical dependency in dealing with alcohol and other drugs. I do not know the percentage of you, out in our society, that consider this a disease. In some of our meetings with parents, many considered this a “phase” that their child was going through, and minimized the “behavioral consequences” that were occuring with their loved ones.

It is a special group of parents that are open and honest about this disease that is trying to kill their child. The compassion and empathy that leaders of a family exhibit show courage that comes in many forms. I have had the privilege to know and support many of these people through AA (Alcoholics Anonymous), REBT groups and personal one on ones. I have also been saddened by parents calling for advice about their child and then shutting me down when I refer to alcohol and other drugs by stating, “I don’t think he or she is doing that!”

Family shame will keep the family in a state of anxiety, depression, fear and anger as well as denial that this is really happening to their family. When a child gets sick with the disease of chemical dependency,

There are only three places that he or she will end up without help – jails, institutions and death. Today’s treatment of chemical dependency for young people leaves a lot to be desired. COVID-19, shortages of counselors and mental health people that deal with young people and stigmas associated with mental health problems still need to be overcome.

There has always been a severe shortage of pediatric mental health care going back to my time in counseling in the ’80s, “90s and early 2000s.

This today has led to long waits and long drives for parents for appointments. The figures have stated that about 70% of U.S. counties do not have a single pediatric psychiatrist, and only half of kids with mental health and chemical dependency problems are cared for by mental health and chemical dependency counselors.

How then do we help this population of children and adolescents? The warning signs of I spoke of in last month’s article: if you see the signs of children withdrawing from friends, drastic changes in mood, behaviors or low performance in schools, weight loss, difficulty in sleeping or especially threatening to hurt themselves or talking about death or suicide. If you see these signs in your child, please make an appointment with your pediatrician to discuss your concerns. If you have a firearm in your home, make sure it is locked and stored away from ammunition. Suicide attempts are often impulsive acts by adolescents and ready access to a gun can drastically increase the risk of death from suicide attempts.

From working with adolescents in teaching, coaching and counseling for over 30 years, I have found the following. These children, many of them, are very demanding and tend to awfulize things out of proportion. If something in their thinking pattern is “bad,” it will stay bad forever. It’s a straight line, not a wave up and down, like some days things will be OK and other days not. Many have severe trust issues, not even trusting people in their own families. Fear of failure, rejection by peers, and bullying add to their “stinking thinking.” Add alcohol ad other drugs and the problems become insurmountable.

Mike Tramuta has been a CASAC counselor for more than 30 years. Call 983-1592 for more information.