Commentary

Quippies

Nin Privitera, former Fredonia resident, offers some offbeat takes on recent headlines:

Nin Privitera, former Fredonia resident, offers some offbeat takes on recent headlines:

-- A humanitarian group recently presented Pope Leo 14th with a gift of a green orb. You know, you can call me crazy, but I've always seen the Pope as a blue orb kind of guy.

-- According to a scientific research group, reading books can slow the aging process. But the bad news is that, by reading this quippie, even though you are laughing uproariously, you still aged about 13 seconds.

-- President Trump had promised that a November election victory for Republicans will allow the federal government to give every adult in America $5,000.So that should give every adult in America enough money to cover the coming cost of a gallon of gas.

-- A team of scientists at Stanford University have developed a mouse with half a human brain. And the mouse just announced that it plans to run for office in the next California Democrat primary.

-- How's this for pure excitement? On Sept. 21st, the White House just launched a new 24 hour TV channel called Trump TV. Gee, I wonder what it's about?

-- A new record was set at the NFL Titans home game against the Eagles on Sept. 20. The temperature of the artificial turf on the field during the fourth quarter reached 157 degrees Fahrenheit. It was the first NFL game where you could get barbecue ribs in the stands and on the field.