First, I’d be remiss if I didn’t thank Bill Hammond for his fine article on the 1972-73 Dunkirk Marauders basketball team as the best team he has seen in the county in the past 50 years. Whether this is true, and I’m sure it’s already been disputed, makes no difference to this coach, because someone close to the game thought so, makes my thinking prejudiced as their coach, always believing that Dunkirk High School will never field a basketball team on the level they were.

As to the banner to honor them, my kids and myself do not care if you ever put it up — it’s been 50 years — because of the old adage (“it’s hard to fix stupid”). Thanks again Billy, and as you know, I always tried to pick you at the coaches and officials meetings, but you were usually gone because of how you called the games — and all coaches wanted you, even Curt.

Second, I’d like to congratulate Pat Fagan of Dunkirk, for being inducted into the Buffalo Entertainment Hall of Fame. Pat ran Shea’s Buffalo for many years as its CEO. He was from here and we attended Sacred Heart Elementary School together and Cardinal Mindszenty together. Regardless of his achievements, he was a much better person than anything he may have accomplished. Great retirement, Pat!

If you have been following this column for the past three months, you would have deduced that I’m heavy on spirituality in recovery. Louie Giglio’s book “Do Not Give the Enemy a Seat at Your Table” has been used worldwide and also in the NFL, NBA, NHL and many other professional sports teams for both men and women. The first three steps in Alcoholics Anonymous deals with spirituality.

Giglio’s book reminds us of the identity that we have in Christ (if that’s who we choose as our higher power) — that every battle that he won, we have won also, God has invited us into a relationship to get and stay sober and exit the enemy (the devil) from our table, all the while winning the battle of our mind.

The problems today in our society and addiction stem from the same kind of irrational thinking based upon demandingness, awfulizing, low frustration tolerance and rating of self-worth, both yours and others.

— Demandingness, based on the belief that “I want what I want when I want it.” Many people today, not just CD people, harbor resentments against people, places, cultures and anything else they can think of. To me when one has a lack of spirituality, one becomes intolerant of people and “systemic racism” flourishes. People with demandingness, whether it’s personal or societal, are closed-minded, not open to new ideas and behaviors. How does demandingness fit into a person’s recovery from alcohol and other drugs? It doesn’t except for negativity. One of the sayings in AA is “easy does it.” Another is simply “judgment before investigation.” Demandingness is part of the disease of CD, and “disturbed negative emotions” that many refuse to confront, only works to keep people sick and keep relapsing.

— Awfulizing: In today’s newscasts, almost everything is awful, terrible, horrible in our society. We are subjected to irrational thinking on the internet, television, newspapers and the propaganda we are fed in advertisements, making it awful if we don’t have this car, this house, this college, this job, etc. Oprah Winfrey had a great slogan that I love, “be happy with what you have, because you’ll have more!” I do not believe she was speaking materially, and I’m not going to tell you, go find it! I used to give my clients an “awfulizing graph” that also helped them to start using different languages in identifying their thinking. Instead of using words like “awful, terrible, horrible,” substitute words like “unfortunate,” “indescribable” that do not give a lot of power to the event. A person’s irrational behavior isn’t “horrible,” it is simply “inappropriate.” Try it, think up your own.

— Low frustration tolerance: Based on the belief that humans cannot tolerate things like death, divorce, firing, bankruptcy, friends leaving them and so forth. A saying goes like this, “physical strength is how much one can carry, while spiritual strength is how much one can bear.” We can tolerate much, much more than we give ourselves credit for. I have worked with addicts that were sick for years, but never gave up trying to get better. When the light went on, and the miracle happened, they were done and never went back to using again. They became counselors, lawyers, doctors, CEOs. Learning how the disease has held one back from “self-actualizing” can be a wonderful thing.

— Rating of worth: Based on the idea that “behaviors” are rated, not people. Not “he’s an idiot,” but “he’s a good guy, but his behavior is inappropriate.”

The reason for changing one’s thinking about these four thinking-feeling states is to start thinking more rationally and have more serenity in your everyday chores.

Finally, one of the recovery groups I still go to had a celebration of a participant’s year anniversary. Pizza and soda and cheesecake were served. The moderator presented an engraved big book and a one-year coin to the client. What struck me was, this used to happen a lot, but not so much anymore.

What did this person do to get a year? First there was a commitment to abstinence. Second, the precepts of the big book were followed, such as the steps, getting a sponsor, staying away from triggers such as people that still use, wet places, and anything that triggers irrational thinking and relapse. This is a selfish program (in the good sense) of making your recovery the most important thing of your life at the present time.

In closing, I simply told this person “this is the rainbow, you’ve been through the rain!” Congratulations, now pass it on!